I ignored the warning signs. I set about washing a load of dishes in the apparent quiet of my house- Lucy and Jack playing happily upstairs.
I suffered the consequences, as well.
As soon as I finished my task, I went upstairs to check on those innocent little chickens, finding a greasy-looking Lucy, and a Jack with bubblegum minty breath and hands full of pink princess toothpaste. She knew that she was in trouble right off.

Toothpaste and lotion make for a strangely pleasant smelling hair product.

I scolded, I washed hands, I tried to clean a mirror subject to the lotion tyrants' attacks, and I called poison control. a child of twenty-two pounds would have to eat twenty-two teaspoons of fluoride toothpaste before being in any danger, and they would probably begin vomiting before that point. Jack maybe had one and a half teaspoons worth, by my judging, but I gave him the recommended milk and put these two in the bath for a Sound hair washing.

Lotion is much easier to get rid of than lanolin. Now I know.