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   We just returned home from an Advent Christian Leadership Conference in North Carolina, and I am feeling a little emotionally dizzy.   I'm excited, and nervous, and excited...
    Josh has been working towards his Masters of Divinity for the last...two years?  three years?   We have been praying about where or if we will go into the exciting and scary world of full-time pastoral ministry, and this last week was very affirming. 
   I haven't ever doubted that Josh could do it.  I am extremely biased, but he is a great preacher.  I love that he is exactly who he is at the pulpit as he is in normal life- which means that sometimes he mentions bodily functions and uses words like"crotch" in his sermons.  But he's real and he means what he says.
   But me?  I am not a pastor's wife.  I'm cranky and crazy and I do not enjoy crafts.  I am over-exuberant and I really like secular music.  I looked at the other pastor's wives at this conference and I felt like a different animal.  It wasn't anyone else's fault.  It was all me.  Everyone was very welcoming and friendly and seemed to be totally accepting of the idea that Josh and I could join their ranks.
   For the first time this week I really felt like this calling that Josh feels is my own, too.  That I'm not the right tool for the job, but in a Master's Hand I can be used to make something excellent.  I felt like I could be satisfied in a traditional church, or in a church that's something else entirely.  And the possibilities are thrilling.  And scary.  And thrilling.

While we were gone, our friends Katie and Chris Bayer watched the kids.  They took them to school, fed them, did CRAFTS with them, and cleaned my house and van.  They also hosted our small group at our house.  Bowden missed us more than he usually does.  Lucy had her nails painted.   Katie said that she rocked Spring pictures for Jack at school, and Miles climbed in bed, professed that he wanted Momma, and then tried to push Chris and Katie out at the same time, saying, "I want to sleep here alooooone."    When we got home at 12:30am PST last night, the house was beautiful, the kids were peaceful, and our bed was made.    I spent all last week with one of my favorite sister-in-laws in Oxnard.  I'm exhausted, on many levels, but very aware of God's goodness.


al'xae said…
I think you're too familiar with only one flavor of pastor's wife. As charming as the sweet version may be, I think your variety would be appealing to a whole different crowd. I wish I could introduce you to my friends Tripp and Trish, they cuss, they blast the secular music... and Tripp is getting his PhD in liturgical studies while preaching every Sunday... They are the way liberal side of the coin but they love Jesus and I think you'd like them a lot. The best I can do is refer you to Tripp's blog;
I think you will continue to be a great wife and a great example and that is all a pastor's wife need be.
abigail said…
I love this post, in part because of your description of Josh preaching and in part because of your use of the word "over-exuberant" to describe yourself. It's one of your BEST qualities!

My family and I are members of an extremely conservative Reformed congregation, with three teaching elders (or pastors). Two are more typical pastor's wives, and I love them both for their kind spirits and wisdom. The third is a misplaced Californian in her late 60's. She's frank and unapologetic, flamboyant at times, warm-hearted, and funny. She's kind and wise, too. I love her dearly, and I've told her many times that our local body would be much poorer for her absence.

I can see you bringing the same life, and I'm glad that God's affirming both you and Josh in this.

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